Greg and I met in college and got married in 2016. We enjoy traveling, camping, hiking, hosting parties at our house, and spending time with family.
Beginning our journey
Our trying to conceive (TTC) story started like so many do, with the unexpected eight-week loss of our first spontaneous pregnancy. We’d felt ignorant bliss when we got a positive pregnancy test within the very first month that we started TTC, and our hearts shattered at our first scan when there was no heartbeat. After an unsuccessful medicated management of my missed miscarriage, I started 2020 with a dilation and curettage (D&C).
We took some time to let our hearts heal as we prepared to try again, but my cycle never returned. I wasted no time contacting Shady Grove Fertility to get to the bottom of things after a friend of mine sang the praises of the doctors in Chesterbrook.
Finding fertility care at SGF
Dr. Brianna Schumacher and Dr. Isaac Sasson listened to my concerns and quickly confirmed what I had feared: I’d developed Asherman’s Syndrome, a rare complication following D&C in which scar tissue develops in the uterus. Mine was severe, but the doctors at SGF offered me hope from the start. We would spend the next several months undergoing surgical hysteroscopies to chip away at the scar tissue in hopes of restoring my uterus, but with the damage that remained, in vitro fertilization (IVF) would be our only choice.
We had our first egg retrieval on Thanksgiving Day in 2020 and started 2021 with preparations for a Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET).
Throughout that year, I had 3 canceled cycles, one early loss requiring D&C and another hysteroscopy, and one failed transfer. The hurdle we now faced was that my uterine lining wasn’t thickening in response to medication. It seemed the damage caused by my Asherman’s was too significant to overcome.
Looking for hope
Throughout our journey, I found a lot of comfort in connecting with other couples who were experiencing infertility. I created an Instagram page, a blog, and an Etsy shop selling fertility products, which all allowed me to build these connections. I found it therapeutic to write about our experiences and found peace in helping others in their process. The doctors at SGF brought me hope, too, and I can remember early on, Dr. Sasson saying to me that I was going to bring home a baby, one way or another. SGF always listened to my concerns and laid out, “if A then B, if B then C” scenarios for me, because they knew that I needed that kind of planning.
Making a new plan
At the end of 2021, Dr. Schumacher supported us through making the difficult decision to pursue a gestational carrier (GC).
One of our best friends knew the challenges we were facing, and she, having completed her own family, made the generous offer to carry our baby. We did another egg retrieval with SGF, made some beautiful embryos, and transported them to another clinic for transfer into our carrier. When our friend’s first transfer was successful, we thought we’d seen the happy ending of our relationship with SGF.
Making the initial decision to use a gestational carrier came with a lot of mixed emotions. Part of me felt immense relief because the pressure of getting pregnant was no longer on me. It was also a grieving process. I had a picture in my head of what building my family would look like and it was hard to accept that it wouldn’t be that way.
I was constantly flip-flopping between excitement for this new beacon of hope in our journey, and sadness at what I was going to be missing out on in not carrying my own child.
It was emotional in ways I’d never expected it to be, too.
As transfer day approached, I worried that I’d be putting one of my best friends through the heartbreak of miscarriage or failed transfer. She remained positive and hopeful, and it was her strength that carried me through transfer day.
Experiencing a surprise
I never expected that two short months after our GC’s successful transfer, I’d be walking back into a Shady Grove Fertility exam room. This time – I was pregnant.
I got a positive home pregnancy test on July 1st, 2022, and, with my history and my diagnosis, I knew that the risks were high. SGF welcomed us back with open arms, performing early monitoring ultrasounds to reassure us that against all odds, this baby was developing beautifully.
From there, however, I felt scared that this rug would be pulled out from under me like so many had before, and that my heart would break in a way that couldn’t be healed this time.
Getting what you want is absolutely terrifying, because it puts you at risk of losing the thing that you’ve always dreamed of. I’ll never forget going to SGF for my 8-week scan and Elyse saying to me, “I know it’s hard to believe you are someone that good things can happen to.”
The support and understanding from SGF continued to carry me onward. While uncertainty and anxiety followed me throughout my pregnancy, I started to allow myself to feel excited after that appointment.
As it turned out, carrying my baby alongside my best friend was such a special experience.
Welcoming a rainbow and sunshine
After three years of struggle and heartache, we welcomed our first son into the world in early January 2023. Dr. Schumacher was one of the first people we contacted after family and friends to share the news – that beautiful embryo SGF had created brought us a perfect little boy. Our rainbow baby; our mountain top view.
Five weeks later, his little brother was born. Once again, Dr. Schumacher was among the first to be notified and she responded with such genuine joy and kindness. While no one thought it would be possible, after our rainbow baby, came this tiny little boy who is pure golden sunshine.
Proof that miracles exist
Our path to parenthood was non-traditional with lots of surprises and bumps along the way, but the compassion and care provided by SGF were unmatched. They helped us navigate difficult decisions and supported us on the scary days.
I’ll forever be grateful to Dr. Schumacher and the entire team at SGF for the part they played in helping us grow our family. I’m so glad we all got to witness this proof that miracles exist.